Mail Call2
Where the Grass is NOT Greener
It is so like you to evaluate your current situation after catching a
glimpse of what is on the other side. Let me tell you however that grass is not
always greener on this side of the bakod (fence), speaking from experience.
Let me remind you of the same words you had given me before when I asked
you about settling down: some people are made for it and
some are just not. Let me bring back the sanity to your thinking by
giving you ten reasons why you have the better of the two worlds:
1. When he comes home early morning from a night out with friends, drunk and
charging the limit on your joint credit card, you have no choice but to figure out a way to get past this situation because you are in a marriage. If he were just your boyfriend, knowing you, he'd be zapped out of your life.
2. Despite two incomes you're figuring out which is the more priority: a romantic
week travel to Italy or a brand new washing machine. I'm sure without much
thought yung lakwartsa pipiliin mo (I'm sure you would choose the one that involves travel).
3. You come home tired and so happy to just have a sandwich but he comes home and sweetly requests a meal. And being a good wife is serving your husband - turo ng mga nanay natin yan (our moms taught us that this is the only way).
4. You want to sleep and he wants something else and the mood is just NOT there.
5. He flaunts his bodily noises around you because you've come to that stage in your relationship when you are more 'comfortable' with each other.
6. You clean the house spotless and then the kids come in from school and throw their stuff all over. Then husband comes home, kicks off his shoes and sits in front of the TV oblivious to the rest of the world. Careerwoman? Tsimay ka sa bahay!
7. You earn an income that is not really yours. It belongs to a joint account to pay the bills, the mortgage, the insurance, and everything else that has nothing to do with you and what used to make you happy.
8. Right when you have finally earned the respect of your peers at work, you get treated as though he still knows best and your opinions do not count. Obvious bang ngitngit na ngitngit ako? (ah...eh....oo)
9. You will never sleep the same way again from the moment you get that first child
(but you know what I am talking about).
10. You can always come up with an alibi not to have dinner with your boyfriend's relatives. When he becomes your husband, they become part of the package and might even stay at your house and take over the household while there.
I have always envied you. Be careful what you ask for at baka magsisi ka. Dios mio wala sanang dwendeng gising nung nagmumuni-muni ka ng mga yan!Sa Wakas!
A partner in life is God's greatest gift. I'm glad you are re-evaluating your choices in life and I think the guy you're seeing now has a lot to do with this. I think my prayers are answered. He seems to be the perfect man for you because he has helped made you change your mind. I will continue to pray for you and hope that God will bless you both. I know things will not always be easy and that you might still change your mind one more time. But maybe I should tell Judith to talk to you some more and maybe invite you to Ohio more often so that you can stay in this frame of mind. You are right, it is really hard to grow old alone. Do get married while you are still young and so you'll have a Joshua of your own.
MY SAGOTS:
I said I was reconsidering. I HAVEN'T gotten engaged over the weekend and I do not see a wedding in a year or 6 months so you can still improve on your repertoire, Jong, if you really intend to sing at my wedding. But I like the suggested processional song: Dito Ba and recessional song: Sino ang Baliw - hehehehe.
Calm down, even my daughter took my reflections with a grain of salt. I am not apt to make major decisions overnight despite the fact that yes, I think I have found a really good man who makes things worth reconsidering. As for the list of WHY NOT's, I can assure you that many of that might not apply since he often is the one who cooks for me (because he doesn't really like Filipino food and he is better at the task), he is quite a considerate man.
But firstly, I have no idea if this is what I really want. Ask me again in two weeks.